Before diving back into editorial, some consideration to energy levels and pacing. Below is a very rough graph of what ought to be going on in Version 1.0 2012. The emotional palette ranges from quirky/comic to downright uncomfortable. The peaks and valleys represent levels of any emotion. There probably could be a map of which emotions.
The start should be at least intrigue, if not rivet. In Version 1.0 2012 we’ve got the skeletons and a ruined nuke waste storage facility. A shocking trippy start if we can pull it off motion graphically, (don’t forget the fluttering prop rental tag). Otherwise, we start all bucolic and pretty with the happy nature reclaiming. The montage is perky with shortwave radio broadcasts shifting into a percussive music video and character intro / pairing.
The pace then calms a bit with Christina sitting in her chair, popping packing bubbles. The phone rings, uncle joe, flashback and then… you’re dead. What? (rising, scary) Amps up to the climax of her opening the door, eek! Yep it’s uncle joe after all (down, relief) but up to his old tricks of course, (up again). Can I come in, and he does.
Anticipation, what the heck is going on? If this is indeed her dead uncle, why isn’t she freaked? There’s something going on here. An angel or what? (rising, curious) You are going to give birth to the daughter of god. (peak, surprise) Really? (falling, nonplussed).
He’s sticking with this scenario, she shuts the door (rising, worried). Negotiations, “there he is”, “down the hall”, “unprotected orgasm”. Ups and downs until, “now?!”
Down and rest for the changing sequence, a trippy intermission back story break. Slight titillation, physical humor all mixed up.
Door, bird poster, crash of glass, “fuck!” (up, excitement / scary). Door opens, (up mystery / scary). Sent by god to fuck you almost climax hold and he says, “c’mon in”, (peak, funny). Banter, ups and downs – “rabbit, dog”, dead bird, “awkward and foolish”. “Getting back to the fucking thing” (rising, excitement) “I don’t know if I can” (drop, let down). She tries to convince and generally the energy is panicky, he’s less and less with the program. She’s flailing. “Why me?”
She gets quiet and wanders about, introspective seeking. For his part he is quiet. Then books, “it’s god”. (rising, risky). His reaction could be negative (rising, anger) but wait he’s making tea… (lowering, relax)
ups and downs, think i could love you too (rising, risky) i like your style (down, relief)
This analysis has been a long time coming. I’ve been focused on just getting a cut that functions, (dealing with snafus like loosing the CU angle in the later third of Christina’s cabin), climbing the learning curve, and reveling in VFX necromancy. Now I am more aware of rhythm – energy peaks and valleys, fast and slow pacing, and ranging across the emotional spectrum. These are my terms, I’m sure this is just rediscovering the wheel and that there are established formulas.
I’d like to articulate my own formula, before studying up on others. There ought to be an overall trend of increasing momentum, an automatic result if the story flows and is engaging. Flow means situations connect via some consistent paradigm, (think world design) and engaging means each moment offers some tricksy emotional conundrum. Then there’s the rhythms – the heartbeat and breathing. Sometimes we’re running, other times were sleeping. A melange of feelings and awareness, not just contrast, (no light without shadow) but the blending of emotion, a little laughter mixed with makery delight and weary ache from riding too long in a cramped control pod. The limping of lost love towards a destiny of death.
Rather than attempt to impose form, the story has an inherent geometry, like the David trapped in marble. I can map out what each moment could be, I can ask where a contrast is suggested and how moments rely on some set-up. I am ready to find the essence of each moment and allow absolute revelation of same.
Boiling is down… based on the teenager test, I’m ready to tighten *everything*. I also realize that kids don’t have the life experience to get the nuance, it’s life experience and occasionally art that introduces nuance. As long as the back story and the world is consistent we’re good. I like the texture that comes from revealing tangential details, but I want to be sure the essential revelations that underpin the actions of the characters stand out.